In the musical film The Greatest Showman, there is a moment in which P.T. Barnum has lost everything – his circus, his fortune, his family. Feeling betrayed and neglected, his wife Charity and two daughters have gone to live with Charity’s parents, the very ones who always said P.T. would never amount to anything. Downtrodden, sitting in a bar alone, Phineas Taylor Barnum is confronted by his own circus acts.
“We don’t want our money that you owe us,” they say. “We know you can’t give that. We want our home back.”
A few days earlier, the building known as The Barnum Museum had burned to the ground, leaving P.T.’s various acts homeless and destitute. When their pain mingles with his, P.T. begins to sing “From Now On”
“I saw the sun begin to dim,
And felt that winter wind blow cold.
A man learns who is there for him
When the glitter fades, and the walls won’t hold.
‘Cause from that rubble, what remains
Can only be what’s true.
If all was lost, there’s more I gained,
‘Cause it led me back to you.”
He stands up and stares his acts – nay, friends – straight in the eyes and makes them this promise…
“From now on,
These eyes will not be blinded by the light.
From now on,
What’s waited ‘til tomorrow starts tonight. It starts tonight.
Let this promise in me start like an anthem in my heart,
From now on,
From now on…”
Thinking back to earlier in the film, we see P.T. taking on non-circus acts, like Swedish singer Jenny Lind, in an attempt to circumvent his “low brow” circus and appeal to the rich and famous, shunning his friends and leaving them behind, and putting his fame-chasing above even his own family. P.T. walks to a wall in his bar – as far as we can tell, he owns this bar – with pictures of all the people he has wined and dined…
“I drank champagne with kings and queens,
The politicians praised my name.
But those were someone else’s dreams
The pitfalls of the man I became.
For years and years, I chased their cheers,
The crazy speed of always needing more…”
P.T. stops and grabs a picture off the wall. It is of his wife and two girls, and he is overcome with emotion as he slams a high note, finishing his verse…
“But when I stop and see you here,
I remember who all this was for!”
P.T. then begins to reiterate his promise as a backbeat and banjo kick in, playing a hopeful and distinctly American sound…
“From now on,
These eyes will not be blinded by the light.
From now on,
What’s waited ‘til tomorrow starts tonight. It starts tonight.
Let this promise in me start like an anthem in my heart,
From now on,
From now on,
From now on!”
And as he finishes his promise with another high-power note, his circus acts leap for joy in resounding forgiveness and hope. They all reanimate almost violently as their leader has once again, finally found his muse, his vision, his direction; and as they dance wildly, they add their gospel chorus of hope and forgiveness to his promise…
“And we will come back home
And we will come back home,
Home again.”
This chorus sets my emotions ablaze every single time I hear it. It is a declaration by these circus folks that they will once again rise from the ashes and be on top. But more than that, it touches places in my heart regarding several things – first, forgiveness.
When we as Christians sin, we are effectively leaving God. (Though he does not entirely leave us.) We are going astray as prodigal sons and daughters. What with P.T. playing the prodigal (P) to a T (T), I can’t help but notice that theme within this chorus. It also makes me think of a faithful husband who leaves every day to make a living for his family. This has become my work alarm on my phone for when quitting time comes, because I will come back home again. And finally, this chorus speaks thematically about the new heavens and earth, a paradise lost, one that we were created to enjoy, one that is our home. And one day, we will come back home again.
Back to our story. P.T.’s promise chorus and the circus chorus are mingling together and breaking down in pure American hootenanny fashion when he suddenly realizes that he has to leave now and go find his family. An assured look from Letty (the bearded lady) and her handing him his signature top hat is all he needs. He bolts out the door to catch the last train to Connecticut to find his family. As P.T. desperately reaches for the moving train, he repeats his promise and barely jumps aboard the caboose.
I have skipped over much in this song and movie. And if you have not seen it, I highly recommend that you do.
As the song peters out, P.T. reaches his family and he has a discussion with his wife. He reiterates his promise, asking for forgiveness. His wife responds with a repeat from an earlier song, “A Million Dreams”, in which the whole of what she says in the bridge is…
“However big, however small,
Let me be part of it all.
Share your dreams with me.
You may be right, you may be wrong,
But say that you’ll bring me along
To the world you see, to the world I close my eyes to see.”
In this moment, forgiveness is given for a promise of repentance, and this is where I will conclude. It’s been a while since we read the promise chorus, so I’ll reiterate here…
“From now on,
These eyes will not be blinded by the light.
From now on,
What’s waited ‘til tomorrow starts tonight. It starts tonight.
Let this promise in me start like an anthem in my heart,
From now on,
From now on,
From now on!”
In many ways and fashions, we wander away from our Father in heaven. This is because of sin. But so long as we can come back and repent, we will come back home again. Some may agree or disagree, but I believe that so long as our sanctification is focused on putting to death the sin that is within us through the power of the Holy Spirit, no sin can condemn us. And no matter how many times we repent, “we will come back home again”.
In closing, go see the Greatest Showman. You will not regret it. It is not a nuanced and accurate portrayal of the real man, but it is a wonderful tale full of meaning.