~ by Linda Lyons
[Advisory warning: contains the theme of abortion.]
The piercing blue eyes, curly blonde locks, and flawless complexion is what Father Flaherty always remembered most about Carol Ann Murphy. She was a girl of 18 years back in 1958, and he had been her priest at St. Luke’s Church since she was a small child. Carol Ann was now attending St. Francis Catholic High School, where Father Flaherty sometimes taught classes. She had received perfect grades there and looked to have a promising future. She came from an affluent and strict family, whom Father Flaherty was very close to. Carol Ann Murphy was, by all accounts, a straight arrow.
But there came a time when Carol Ann was spending less time doing her schoolwork. Her parents had come to Father Flaherty expressing concern over a recent boy that she had met. This particular fellow was named Johnny Reno, and no one knew exactly where he came from. He had drifted into town and started washing dishes at the local diner. He’d also had a few minor scrapes with the law.
Her parents were concerned as well that Carol Ann was straying away from her longtime love, Daniel Hartemann; they both attended St. Francis, and had been on and off for most of those four years. Daniel was a polite, bespectacled young man of great intelligence, but he was also meek and painfully shy. In the fall he would go on to college and then, from there, hopefully to medical school. Both Carol Ann and Daniel’s parents greatly approved of this union; both families were prominent in town and they knew each other well.
The solution was very clear; her parents wanted her to stop seeing Johnny Reno.
At the behest of the Murphy family, Father Flaherty had spoken with Carol Ann, stressing to her the importance of remaining focused, that these were her formative years and thus the decisions made therein would affect the rest of her life. It seemed to Father Flaherty that many teenagers went through this rebellious stage, especially ones with such a strict upbringing. But after speaking with Carol Ann, he was sure she had gotten it out of her system. It seemed that he was right in his assessment, as soon her studies improved in her senior year.
Father Flaherty had once driven through the parking lot of the high school. He had been looking for a student, in order to wish him good luck with his future athletic aspirations. As he drove past the football field, there stood Johnny Reno, leaning against his red Oldsmobile Rocket 88. His raven-black hair was greased in a high pompadour with long sideburns. A cigarette hung from his mouth, and he wore a black leather jacket, blue jeans with the bottoms turned up, and red Converse high tops. A silver skull ring was on his finger. He was standing between two pretty girls that sat on his car, both wearing plaid skirts, their school books on their laps. Reno had some sort of animal magnetism and posed a dangerous attraction for young women, but Father Flaherty knew that Johnny was older and did not attend this school.
As Father Flaherty drove by Johnny, he locked eyes with him for a few tense seconds. He was glad, then, that he had a clear duty to steer Carol Ann away from this would-be James Dean.
***
Father Jerome James Flaherty was born in 1915 in a working-class Boston neighborhood. His grandparents had immigrated from County Clare, Ireland, where they had been impoverished peat cutters. As he grew up on the mean streets of Boston, he saw how many boys eventually became controlled by greed and power. Money seemed to be the most important thing to them and this caused many of them to join gangs – a path that almost always ended in their ruination, either by imprisonment or by being murdered.
As a thoughtful boy, Father Flaherty always felt that there was a deeper meaning to life – a spiritual side that many others didn’t seem to be in touch with. He didn’t want to fall into the same traps and pitfalls, nor to make the same mistakes that many others did. The same mistakes that the Bible warned about, mistakes that had been ingrained in human nature since the beginning of mankind. He’d always sensed a higher power and felt that it was his calling in life to serve this power. This led him to join a seminary in Boston, much to his mother’s joyful pride.
Soon, he was ordained by the Boston Archdiocese, and eventually moved to Connecticut. When he first arrived, he viewed Sconset Township, founded in 1640’s after the Pequot War, as a very quaint and colonial town. But under that placid surface, Father Flaherty soon learned about the dark secrets in Sconset. He thought that maybe this was why God had sent him to this small town in rural Connecticut – perhaps to cleanse it before the coming Judgment Day.
It was now the spring of 1958 and Father Flaherty was 42 years old. He was slight and thin, not very tall – maybe 5’6” – with gray-blue eyes, reddish brown hair, and many freckles.
***
It was a beautiful spring day as Father Flaherty walked down the main street with its many bright-red, brick buildings. He was visiting Aspetuck, a few towns over from Sconset, because he liked the bakery there.
He had mailed a package to a friend in Florida, and as he walked out of the post office, he stopped to smell the lilacs in the air, and to take in the pink cranesbill blooming over the white picket fences in the distance. He wore his usual paddy hat and black slacks, with black tweed jacket – his Roman collar showing beneath. His familiar pipe was in his mouth. The sky was a pure blue with a few scattered clouds and, far in the misty distance, he could see undulating green hills.
He crossed the street to his black Ford four-door sedan, holding a white box containing muffins, doughnuts, and cupcakes. As he unlocked the door and got in, he noticed a familiar car parked across the street in a side alley. It was a red Oldsmobile – he knew that car.
He was about to look away and start the ignition when he saw movement in the red car – hands gesticulating in wild motions, as though two people were arguing. He then saw a familiar face get out of the car; it was Johnny Reno, in black leather jacket and blue jeans. Reno walked around the back of the car to the passenger side and pulled a young blond girl out by the hand. It was Carol Ann Murphy. He led her by the hand – almost dragging her behind him – and they disappeared behind the building. But Father Flaherty knew there was a doctor back there, and it was whispered that he performed certain dark practices.
He took the pipe from his mouth and said a small prayer, then started the car and drove back to Sconset.
***
A singing group called The Aces crooned a love ballad on the stage inside of St. Francis School’s gymnasium. It was filled with balloons and colorful banners. Draped tables had punch bowls and many different kinds of foods on them. Father Flaherty stood off to the side, chaperoning the dance, while drinking a punch and smiling and waving at people.
He saw Carol Ann dancing with Daniel. She wore a plaid dress and a dark blue V-neck sweater with the St. Francis emblem stitched upon it. Daniel wore beige slacks, a tie, and a dark blue jacket with the same emblem.
“Father!” someone called across the gymnasium.
Father Flaherty turned around and saw Carol Ann’s parents approaching; Mr. Murphy had his hand raised. They came together, shook hands and hugged.
“Father, Carol Ann is doing great,” Mr. Murphy said over the music. “I want to thank you for all your guidance these years. You were a big influence. You got her on the right path again.”
“I’m so glad to hear it. I know she will excel at the university.”
“Yes, she’s off in the fall.”
Father Flaherty then spoke with the mother for a while. He looked up from the conversation briefly once, and watched Daniel and Carol Ann dancing. Carol Ann was laughing and smiling, as though without a care in the world.
***
Father Flaherty sat at his desk in the empty classroom of St. Francis Catholic High School, sifting through his drawers. He looked up and saw Carol Ann walking by in the hall outside, holding her books.
“Hello, Carol,” he called out to her.
“Oh, hi, Father!” she replied as she came inside. “I was just cleaning out my stuff.”
“Did you enjoy the dance?”
“Yes, a great deal, thank you.”
“Are you excited about college?”
“Yes,” she said with a smile. Then the smile faded and she looked down towards the floor, as though thinking. “Father, I wanted… I wanted to thank you for all your help.”
“You’re welcome; that’s why I’m here. You seem troubled, though. Is there anything you want to discuss?”
Carol Ann came forward and sat on top of one of the desks, looking down at her bobby socks and black and white saddle shoes as she shifted them on the black-and-white checkered floor.
“Well… no, everything is okay.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, Father. My parents are proud, and Daniel and I are doing great,” she replied as she looked up.
“I’m glad to hear it. But are you sure there’s nothing on your mind? Something that would stay between me and you? I know how demanding parents can be.”
Carol Ann averted eye contact with Father Flaherty, and looked down at the floor again, in apparent contemplation. Father Flaherty thought that he might be making some headway.
But then she looked back up with a beautiful, glowing smile and a piercing shine in her blue eyes.
“No Father, everything is great.”
Father Flaherty looked at her for a few moments. “Ok then,” he sighed. “I’ll see you at Mass on Sunday?”
“Yes, thank you, Father,” she said and walked away, still holding her books close to her chest, as though they were a wall that gave her protection against all her troubles – enough to keep the pressing, worrisome world at bay.
Father Flaherty got up and walked around to the front of the desk, leaning against it, with his hands folded in front of him and head hung, the blackboard looming behind him. He was a stark black image standing alone in that empty classroom.
He walked over to the window and, in sadness, watched Carol Ann walk across the spring-green lawn of St. Francis. The sun played upon her flaxen hair and made the grass shine golden. Robins fluttered and hopped on the green lawn, under a pure blue sky with big white clouds.
“Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above gold and rubies,” Father Flaherty quoted from Proverbs as he gazed out the window.
Then he thought about Daniel Hartemann and continued quoting: “The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of worry. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life….”
He watched her walk farther on into the distance – this child of God, walking on in unconfessed sin.
***
Nobody knows what became of Johnny Reno. During the summer, he had been picked up by police for street racing. After he made bail, he split town, never to be seen again in Sconset. As mysteriously as he had drifted into town, he had left – leaving behind him a trail of broken hearts.
Carol Ann and Daniel eventually got married. In time, they had three beautiful daughters. Daniel went on to become a successful cardiologist, and they moved to Greenwich, Connecticut. As far as Father Flaherty knew, Carol Ann went on to live in relative happiness.
But Father Flaherty knew that she had a secret burden. He wished that he could have helped to cleanse her of it, for it stood between her and God. But that was her choice. That blemish on her soul, that veil of sorrow that she must wear, was something she would have to carry for the rest of her life, until ultimately seeking forgiveness.